I remember when I was five years old, I couldn’t wait to turn six. I thought the whole world would become brighter the moment I turned six. Interesting though, how when I turned six, nothing changed, except me wanting to turn seven. And when I was seven, I couldn’t wait to be a teenager. When I was a teenager, I couldn’t wait to become an adult, and soon I was an adult wishing I was five years old again, dreaming of becoming six. Why are we never satisfied with who we are right now? Why don’t we ever slow down and enjoy the moments of the present, instead of focusing on the past, or trying to jump to the future?
One of the most important wellness topics I’ve learned comes from a TEDTalk called “The Happiness Advantage” by Shawn Anchor. Anchor says,
“Most companies and schools follow a formula for success, which is this: If I work harder, I’ll be more successful. And if I’m more successful, then I’ll be happier. That undergirds most of our parenting and managing styles, the way that we motivate our behavior. And the problem is, it’s scientifically broken and backwards for two reasons. Every time your brain has a success, you just changed the goalpost of what success looked like. You got good grades, now you have to get better grades, you got into a good school and after that you get into a better one.”
Thinking back to my childhood self, while turning a year older might not be the yearning for success Anchor is talking about, it’s exactly where that separation between success and happiness stems from. We are constantly in a habit of thinking things will be better in the future instead of being grateful for how they are now. Parents, as you begin to gear up for your child’s next birthday party, remind yourself (and your child) that life is okay the way it is right now, and that every age they turn has its own milestones to be excited about.
Below are just a few milestones by age so your family can live more in the now! Find your child’s age and make your own list of exciting firsts to look forward to this year and right now! There are tons!
(1-2) crawling, first words, first steps, walking
(3-4) sleeping in a big bed, becoming potty trained
(5-6) playing on a sports team, starting school, learning to ride a bike
(7-8) losing the first tooth, joining Cub Scouts
(9-10) riding in a car with no booster seat
(11-12) puberty, starting middle school
(13-14) becoming a teenager, starting high school, riding in the front seat of a car
(15-16) obtaining a driver’s permit and first driver’s license, flying alone on a plane
(17-18) viewing an R-rated Movie, graduating from high school, registering to vote, becoming an adult
